I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair. I hate the way you drive my car, I hate it when you stare. I hate your big dumb combat boots and the way you read my mind.I hate you so much it makes me sick, It even makes me rhyme. I hate the way you’re always right, I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry. I hate it when you’re not around, and the fact that you didn’t call. But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you,not even close…Not even a little bit… not even at all.
down in the dumps.
everyday gets a little harder.
I miss his voice, his cute face, his goofy personality
the way he does these little things that mean so much to me.
dear god please keep giving me the strenght to keep pulling through
please keep him safe<3
I’m sitting here now thinking wether he will come home or not
&i’m scared shitless.
I talked to my mom tonight about what i’d do if he were to you know…..
and i cried.
i’ve never lost a loved one in my life
i know i know i shouldn’t be thinking of this crap but it still sitting in the back of my mind.
all the what if’s and possibilties have me going crazy
as i talked to my mom she made a clear point
“we can have all the bad gut feelings in the world
but only god knows when we will go.”
she said “life goes on
with or without him you have to pull it together.
don’t spend your time worrying about wether something is going to happen or not”
shes right i shouldn’t worry
but sometimes i can’t help it
these 9 months are going to be long&painful
but they will only make me stronger
i’m strong. i can do this.
i just have to remember to hold it together.
not only for myself but for my son too.
my son is my life. I need to be as strong as i can be for him.
I know god will help me through.
i will be doing a lot of praying.
I know i will pull through.
1) pass phlebotomy class get my.certificate. 2) complete internship. 3) take state test to get license in phlebotomy. 4) enjoy summer with my new baby boy.
5 more weeks to go:)